2.30am Pulang Mendengar Wasiat

banyak coretan hendak aku buat sejak hari jumaat. awal persediaan ke himpunan mansuh, penahanan bai, sukarelawan tahanan perhimpunan di balai polis bukit jalil sampailah ke site visit program rehlah KiDHL. tapi mungkin hati terpanggil untuk menulis berkenaan tajuk posting dahulu, takut terlupa harapan dan pesanan-pesanan terakhirnya.

mungkin belum lagi masanya untuk abi pergi, tapi sejak seminggu lepas, abi demam-demam. medical check-up pula mengesahkan kehadiran air dalam jantung abi, which is not a very good sign especially in a condition like him. currently, he's heart is functioning with only 40% of it's actualy strength. below 50%....its less than half.

kebetulan malam tadi, kami adik beradik semua ada di bangi. odi dan amin datang ke DK sekitar 2.00am untuk panggil aku pulang. mereka cuba hubungi hp, tapi kehabisan battery sebab tak charge sejak perhimpunan mansuh tempoh hari. sudah pasti ia panggilan pulang yang agak berat bagiku. dalam hati sudah terdetik yang bukan-bukan. tapi aku gagahkan diri untuk balik jua.

"entah, abi terasa nak sangat jumpa anak-anak malam ni..keadaan abi sekarang dah kurang sihat. Dr tak kasi minum air, tapi tekak abi terasa sangat haus. abi tak panggil semua untuk sedihkan anak-anak, tapi abi nak sampaikan pesanan. jantung abi dah tak kuat, mungkin abi tak pergi dalam masa terdekat ni, tapi kita kena bersedia.

abi tak ada harta sangat. rumah-rumah sewa tuh jelah yang ada..buku-buku abi yang banyak kat rumah ni, manfaatkanlah. (itu jelah harta aku boleh relate dengan ayah aku, rumah-rumah sewa tu tak pernah terlintas dalam fikiran). abi ada 4 lagi buku yang belum terbit, abi ketepikan untuk anak-anak dan umi uruskan. 

jaga waktu solat, jangan tinggal. jaga kebajikan umi, bantu umi. nanti kalau abi perlu, mungkin atuk kita kena hantar ke rumah orang-orang tua. take care of atuk. abi mintak maaf banyak-banyak pada semua, abi selalu buat semua orang susah. abi redha dengan semua orang. abi tak ada simpan sedikitpun dalam hati."

mungkin as time flows by, aku akan ingat lagi bait-bait ucapannya malam itu. 

cuma, mampukah aku teruskan perjuangannya. mampukah aku jadi setanding dengannya?

pada yang membaca, panjatkan doa untuk ayahku, Dr. Hafidzi Mohd Noor..agar terus dikurniakan kesihatan berpanjangan, kekuatan untuk meneruskan perjuangan. mungkin boleh bantu jika sms kata-kata semangat..ziarah mungkin kurangkan. keadaannya tak begitu mengizinkan orang untuk datang ziarah (keletihan yang amat sangat).

aku hargai jasa semua. terutamanya, being there with him, when i myslef isn;t there to help him.

MANSUH...panggilan sudah berkumandang!

apakah engkau masih mahu duduk sekadar menyaksikan?

perubahan dunia yang dilakukan sang pejuang

enak sangatkah berlindung dibalik dinding rumah merasa selamat?

sedang mereka dikurung dicerca dihambat

engkau mahu merubah dunia, tapi hanya dengan kata-kata?

berjuang dan bercakap, dua medan yang tiada sama

sibukkan diri dengan perkara kecil, sebab engaku tiada kaitan?

ya mungkin bukan engkau atau keluarga engkau dibalik jeriji besi kamunting...

يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُواْ مَا لَكُمْ إِذَا قِيلَ لَكُمُ انفِرُواْ فِي سَبِيلِ اللّهِ اثَّاقَلْتُمْ إِلَى الأَرْضِ أَرَضِيتُم بِالْحَيَاةِ الدُّنْيَا مِنَ الآخِرَةِ فَمَا مَتَاعُ الْحَيَاةِ الدُّنْيَا فِي الآخِرَةِ إِلاَّ قَلِيلٌ

[Taubah:38] Hai orang-orang yang beriman, apakah sebabnya bila dikatakan kepadamu : "Berangkatlah (untuk berperang) pada jalan Allah" kamu merasa berat dan ingin tinggal di tempatmu? Apakah kamu puas dengan kehidupan di dunia sebagai ganti kehidupan di akhirat? Padahal keni'matan hidup di dunia ini (dibandingkan dengan kehidupan) diakhirat hanyalah sedikit.

وَلَوْ أَرَادُواْ الْخُرُوجَ لأَعَدُّواْ لَهُ عُدَّةً وَلَـكِن كَرِهَ اللّهُ انبِعَاثَهُمْ فَثَبَّطَهُمْ وَقِيلَ اقْعُدُواْ مَعَ الْقَاعِدِينَ

[Taubah:46] Dan jika mereka mau berangkat, tentulah mereka menyiapkan persiapan untuk keberangkatan itu, tetapi Allah tidak menyukai keberangkatan mereka, maka Allah melemahkan keinginan mereka. Dan dikatakan kepada mereka: "Tinggallah kamu bersama orang-orang yang tinggal itu."

Diversity: how you look on it?

Talking about this issue, it reminds me of my first National program that i attended as a participant: Konvensyen Tarbiyah Nasional (KONTARN) in 2007 which was held in Melaka. One of the input sessions was given by Dr. Harlina (Ketua Wanita JIM) on 'Diversity Management'.

i couldn't recall all the significant points shared during the talk, but what i could conclude from it was that diversity will happen in organizations and in our daily lives. thus how we manage it will reflect on the effects, either we deal with it or ignore, either we take advantage of it or let it be in control, either we demolish it or put some effort towards working together.

Currently i'm doing my practical training in STS. We have this Turnaround (TA) project with Petlin where my company provides the maintenance services during the regulatory DOSH shutdown. having to work 7 days a week, going back at 10pm, i see and deal with alot of trends and personalities. There are those who blame, while others won't take the blame. There are those who are committed, while others take advantage. There are those who know, while others act like they know. There are those who gets work done, while....well, no one gets work undone or lag behind!

Yeap, thats the scenario here. We deal with alot of diversity, from different family backgrounds, different working style, different company..work is still being done. and everyone is chasing progress. no progress is not an option.

I've learnt alot from my supervisor, who is also the STS Terengganu Branch Manager and the TA manager; Hj Fakhrul Anuar Hj Zulkawi. I'm very impressed with how he handles diversity, how he changes stressful situations and changes it into opportunities that opens up new beginnings. It's probably how he views it. From that only each 'defect' can be 'chances' in management.

From the PKMY scene, we have guys who stick with PKMY, while others prefer 3RUNMY. This is also a complex situation where we have different opinions but stick together. As i strongly believe that by being in one big community will benefit all. Although the opportunity to discuss such issue in the community is quite hard, but by looking at it in a possitive manner will solve alot rather than arguing on it with no solution. 

It was just yesterday that i had dinner with some of the Petlin trainees who were also the same age as me from UTP. Shakur, Rizal, Farid and Hafiz. I met Rizal the first time i went into Petlin, and had the first impression of that he must be damn rich since he's such a young engineer. Then i met Rizal while applying my TA briefing card, i addressed him 'abang'. hahaha..the second time we met was outside the Petlin Musolla. Only then we got the chance the introduce ourselves.

We shared our backgrounds, and it turns out that Shakur knows Abdullah Omar...as the President of KARISMA. So i asked if he joins any of the KARISMA's activities or perhaps want to join. He answered that he's already involved with another wadah, which i didn't ask further.

so what is it..

A) different ship, same destination?

B) same ship, different task, same destination?

C) different ship, same flag, same destination?

To me personally, i'd go for B. i don't know, but to me..We all are on the same ship and we all agree to the one flag that the ship carries. It's just that we have different task so that the ship always progresses forward towards our ultimate destination. If one section fails or slows down with they're designated tasks, the ship also slows down. If one crew section lags behind, all crew lags too.

Which one answer we pick..the question still lingers.

WHERE IS OUR KHALIFAH..OUR SHIP CAPTAIN?

to be continued after jumaah prayer (5/6/2009-sts petlin TA)